Current mood:	worried
Current music:	beautiful poses

life is a game, love is a trophy
...Ah! This Friday, I will be leaving early in the morning for Mexico! I'm super excited! It will be so much fun and interesting and amazing. I've never been away from the United States for this long (6 weeks), especially in an area with English not being the primary language (I consider Dayton to be primarily Spanish... haha). I'm nervous, at the same time, because I hope I make some good friends and enjoy myself.

Hopefully, I won't spend too much. I'm guessing it'll be like living over there, basically, with once in a while eating out or buying a gift. I won't go stark-crazy and spend every penny... and I won't be drinking every night, so maybe I'll retain some money to spend once I get back to the United States for things I NEED up in college (more stain for the bookcases... ugh).

I am currently having a crisis, though. :-( I don't know what I want to do after I graduate college! I was looking at a job search online, entering keywords "economics" and "Spanish" and all that came up was boring garbage that isn't very interesting at all. One was remotely interesting with good pay, but by the time I graduate, it'll be gone. I'm so worried I won't get a job.

And then there was the random idea of going to law school. Why? I don't really know- something that sounds interesting. I've always fancied becoming a judge at some point, and I've always marvelled at having a job where you have to study really hard and long for it. I guess I should have picked a major with more of a sturdy outline of what I am to become, like engineering or education, because economics has NO outline whatsoever. None. Major in economics? Sure! You can get a job as a million different things that have no relation at all. Maybe.

Law school would be nice, then I could become a lawyer. However, law school is adding more years to education, which I've already decided a while back that I was tired of. Also, after researching, law school costs quite a pretty penny. Most graduates are around 100,000 dollars in debt. That's a lot. I have no idea what my debt is for VA Tech (I think my dad said somewhere around 30,000), but that number just scares me. Plus, even if I did go and graduate, that throws off plans of settling down with Jason and us getting jobs and saving up and adopting kids, etc...

I think what will happen, now that I think about it, is that I'll end up with a really boring job. I'll keep at it for a while, and after a few years, perhaps after acquiring a kid, I'll go back to school when I'm older and pursue a law degree. I think it would be fantastic to become a lawyer, and eventually, a judge. Lots of money... and plus, it is just interesting.

I don't know. I really need to set up an appointment with my advisor and career services and have them point me in the right direction. That won't happen until 2 months, however, when the fall semester starts (actually 2 and a half months). I have classes next week... boo. It sucks to think that I'm going to a different country in two days, but I still have to take classes at the university there. Oh well.

Missing Jason hurts so bad. With all of this job stuff and going to Mexico and everything on my mind, I think about him constantly and how everything will affect him. I want the best for me AND him. I think that after I talk with my advisors, I should talk to him, as well. I want him to be comfortable, because I love him dearly and I want us to be happy forever. :-) ...